I want to be nice,

Not cruel.

I do not want to do anything,

To my one that he’s done to me.

How do I get in a relationship,

Knowing that hands on me,

He will feel it.

How do I do anything with the knowledge,

That if I get a tongue in my mouth,

It might go in his.

How do I live?

I swear,

I will not do to him,

What my lover has done to me.

I am going to do this,

Hoping,

He stops that intimacy,

I want to be intimate with him.

I do want to know everything that he wants to share.

I know I do love women.

I got scared when she kissed my hand,

And he was with me.

I hear her whisper in his ear,

And I know he’s thinking about me,

Or this is something he cannot control.

So I cannot bring another man into the cage.

I cannot do to my one,

My lover,

What he decided to do to me.

So I might never be with another man,

Or woman ever again.

Am I a monster,

For not wanting to share in his sex life?