Merry Christmas so I can have some updates to to everything I'm really high as a kite right now and so this might not make sense but my new single my first single ever hot dogs is going to be coming out out soon buy whole album was not planned it was some sonnets and poems Shakespearean sonnets to be correct and somehow it. Has ended with our kind came to me singing or speaking whatever I don't know how to explain it but I've really been kind of sad and today has been I'm pretty sad but I've kept it together and it's 4:08 a.m. so it's a new day and I just smoked big blunt that was really decent I'm trying to remain calm and not start to panic because I've been panicking a lot lately and it's very disturbing and it's scaring me kind of but the song Hot Dogs my producer is telling me to have the album art artwork ready and it's coming along but she originally said that my album was going to be up before Halloween and and Halloween was months ago but it's just a little strange that in other words over Christmas I was having a bad gout attack and I was walking around with my cane like Selma Blair but it really hurt thank goodness it's going away but it's not good and I think I'm going through an episode of mania because I'm I don't know how to just describe it but it's nothing more than all over the place it's like today I was watching a hummingbird feeder and I had filled all of them today I made new hummingbird food but I was sitting in my car getting stoned and I was just staring off into will not staring off into space just looking atla cast the front door to the house and just thinking all this sad stuff end like not being able to snap out of it it was I know I hated it it was really awful and I never I always could do you like Nat and just get up and wipe all that s*** off I've been really sad being all alone at 4:15 a.m. is really sad I used to not give a s*** but now lonely this in the silence it's almost dead deafening did you hear that did anyone stomach just Rumble I just had the classic you're wondering where that came from I am doing I don't know what it's called speaking and it's like writing everything out I know it has a word but so that's why it's if you're reading this is like like whoa whoa whoa whoa but it's easier to do this then really stoned and crying that type this little device and it takes a long ass time so doing it like this is way easier I tried and like before it posts or I put it on I like to proofread bike on God damn Instagram the way it's set up if you go back and you want it edit your post where the cursor is is that on the on the page you have to scroll up or scroll down and then when you pillow letter it goes all the way back up to the it's just as this weird thing so it's editing picture is not like it was before before I think it is that was done on in more other news it's 4:18 a.m. it's almost 4:20 a.m. and I was just going to mention Simon by completely forgot what I was getting at anyways just chairs made this weird sound that I'm sitting on it sounds funny it's f****** cold let me see it's a f****** 30-something degrees I had my blankies on it's little heater that's not working very well it's 4:19 a.m. damn I am so damn stone oh that's why I was going to I didn't know I was going to talk about my only fans page and no it's not what your what anyone's thinking of what that it was summer time I wanted to do Stephon the yard and all that and work on my tan and content like that my scar from that surgery ended up getting all jacked up so I had to wear a shirt so it didn't get more messed up so there went that influencer part about the tan B so it is now 4:20 a.m.