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butch1977

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 I now have I now have the ability to go live on YouTube before when I tried it said I needed to have a certain amount of subscribers so I wasn't able to.  That's bulshit anyways for the last couple months they must have changed it because now my channel.  I am allowed to go live.  Isn't that great so since. Im currently at a very depressed era in my life.  More than ive ever felt.  one thing that I did notice is when I'm feeling so lonely and awful really late.  Going live is like you're talking to someone and i dont feel  completely alone.  So  last night I went live and was talking about an hour and a half I was like I'm Delilah Hamlin and her really long live on ig and none of it was like thought out or planned there was no script behind it but I cover up lot of topics and very personal topics ones that I've only went into on certain forms I've blogged about it on here before. The abuse  s*** . I'm talking about rape and all that and it was It was kind of bizarre because it's very very personal and private and from my videos on my YouTube tell me the person behind all of that there's an I've never really made videos with myself I've never made them where I talked in them previously because I didn't don't like the my voice so putting my face and voice has not been something that I've that I've always done I would say the past 2 years maybe. II don't think anyone will ever watch those videos of me babbling on and on about all kinds of s*** .

So in other news I am going to work on my album this Sunday I was supposed to on Wednesday but it didn't happen and it was supposed to happen last week sometime it didn't happen either My producer has been a little preoccupied with himself and his other Music . One of them is a band that's been broken up for about 10 years plus and he just recently had said that he was had so much stuff that he was doing and he needed to slow down but when Instagram shows all those stories and shit he's posting of all of this his other music. Songs that were not recorded and unheard Little Gems.  I think that they that wait another few months because I think I originally said that there was talk that my album would be out by Halloween . I didn't think it was going to be done I was right. But when I see that there's other stuff that's getting attention that I had heard was not going to get attention I get confused and it irritates me . I don't mind that people have other things to do but don't say you're going to do something and then not.

If it's all talk and no action then that's all it is is just talk. It's very frustrating when people get amnesia like that so easily they just forget what they talked about or what they said they were going to do. I don't get it cuz I know what I say and when I say I'm going to do something I do it and I get the job done . I take  giving my word serious. I don't say I'm going to do something and not do it if I say I'm going to do it you better believe I'll do it and if I promise that I'll do it there's no way in hell that I will not do it because it's a promise I will do it and I keep my word. With me it's loyalty, kindness and honesty and no bulshit I keep it real.

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