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How your life can change within a matter of days



*I have been having migraines for quite sometime now..only in the past six-eight months, did I notice a change in them, some more severe than others. I could go months without having one, than weeks having one.

Back track to 2 weekends ago, when I went to visit Kel. *

That weekend went to Kel's to visit, then we were heading to Richmond to Lady GaGa. That whole weekend I was fine. Went on the train, was fine( I slept on the train), got to Kel's was fine. Met some friends of hers, fine too. All fine. Hell I was even fine, on the way up to Richmond. All I kept on saying how beautiful it was(on the drive up to Richmond(being where I am from,DE/NYC..you don't get to much nature beauty around these parts..HA HA!!)

( I was a little under some stress, because 2 days before I was to leave, my car broke down..but other than that, nah..nothing out of the ordinary..just stress..a little)

Even Monday when we arrived in Richmond, fine. We spent the afternoon relaxing, taking a walk to where the venue was, to getting ready and eating something. Then headed off to venue...

And this is where my life changed...forever!

Walking there, I noticed I started to get a headache(not a migraine..and trust..you know the difference), nothing out of the ordinary, nothing different. Got in line, and started to talk to people, in about 5 minutes from that, I started to have "auras"...everything was like in a kaleidoscope, That is when I knew I was not gonna make it. I couldn't even open my eyes...just to fraction of a slit, the light was killing my head, I couldn't stand( I had to sit..or from what I was told, I wanted to lay down, but I just wanted a bed..and kel kept on going...a flower bed, which what was right behind me..at that point I really didn't freakin' care..as long as I could lay down..flowers or no flowers..LOL!!!). I noticed a numbness go down my left arm(which is now a PERMANENT reminder of that night, but now it is my pinky finger and half of my arm) My head was hurting so damn much, I though I was having a brain aneurysm. I really thought I was gonna die. That is how intensified this "migraine" was. I was crying. I had no idea what the hell was going on..you loose almost all your senses, but yet you have them..weird...

* I am not even gonna get into the cab ride back to the hotel..all I am gonna say is that, that effer, I just wanted to punch the hell out of him..to the way he was driving, to the way he was hollering at Kel...but I couldn't move..at least I did have "some senses" going....

Back at hotel...

I freakin' slept!!! But I could still feel my head pounding, hurting like no end tomorrow..but I slept!!! And "snored"..according to a person... I did wake up for an hour or two. I was hungry..ordered room service and then went to back to bed.

Woke next morning, felt a whole lot better, but still had the lingering of "migraine", got to train station, got on train to go home...got home, picked up car from shop, went home laid down, went to work.....

"Migraine" #2..
While working, I noticed yet again, another "headache". I literally had to call my operator to run the line while I ran into my office and put my head down on my desk. ...In the frekin' dark. It helped, but when I went back out after 30 minutes, but I had to put on my sunglasses..they were the only things keeping me from having the exact same thing happen to me, from night before. I really couldn't run the line after that, I did, some paperwork that had to be done, and I noticed the "auras' happening again, everything was like in a kaleidoscope,..bright, and all nifty..NOT!

When I got home the next morning..IMMEDIATELY I called my doctor. I got an appointment, for later that afternoon. He wanted me to have an MRI and an EEG Immediately....this is when I got scared(and who wouldn't?). I asked him is this necessary? He said yes, brain tumor, epilepsy, migraines or headaches. He wanted to rule out as much as he could, Great! Left me feeling fine and happy! NOT!!! But couldn't agree with him more..I wanted to find out what the hell it is, that is going on....

Ok so I went had the MRI and EEG. They both of them came back "not matching one another" in other words gotta have them again... But he did rule out brain tumor and headaches...ok..yeah, the worst it is not..and the least it is not. But what it boils down to is either a) epilepsy b ) migraines or c) both....

But Friday, he did put me on Topamax(200 mg 4x's daily), cause we are not sure, but he also said that, this medicne does help both, but he also said that what I could have had is not really a migraine, but an epileptic seizure. UMMM....I always thought you had to have convulsions and all that neat jazz...NOT SO!!! I could stare, and that is an epileptic seizure. He said it sounds like I may have partial-onset seizures. He also said that migraines AND epilepsy are BOTH..chronic neurological disorders... and there can be an extremely fine line between them. But he is not making ANY diagnoses, till I have the MRI and EEG, again.

So that is where I stand right now...Light is almost impossible(it has taken awhile to type this), so I am wearing sunglasses, same with TV, phone as well. It triggers the "migraine". I literally sit and stare in the dark. getting on the computer I can, but it lasts for a half hour-forty five minutes..then off. All of my kids and family have been extremely loving, and supportive(minus my step-father..that is a whole other issue..but I expected nothing more of him. dry.gif ).

And this where we, as individuals, find out who our best friends truly are. It has been a hard two weeks, dealing and learning what I can and can not do. And my "best friends" have been here helping with my kids, coming over, calling me.

Life is grand..isn't it?

You just never know when and/or where it is gonna change...



You all have a great week...



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